“It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.”
What does it take to know you’re good enough? Is it power, inner strength, determination or resilience? Is it something you have to be told or was someone able to instil in you, the belief that you count, that you matter and that you are more than good enough? Sometimes it only takes one person to tell you that you are special. For some, it’s an entire village filled with caring and considerate people that show them, good-enough is something each of us deserve. But, sadly for some, it’s no one.
Growing up I had a hunch that I had something to prove. I lived under a veil of expectations that failure was likely. My intention was never to be the best, I just wanted to succeed. I believed that if I could prove everyone else wrong about their assumptions of me, then and only then would I feel like I was worth something. When I think back and recall the 12-year-old version of myself, I wish there were things she knew about herself. I also wish that the building blocks of her foundation of self never included doubt from others; that she then internalized into her own version of self-doubt. If given the opportunity, I would tell her that despite the struggles and pain she might face, she has the ability to see the opportunity in every experience. I would share with her the reality that her determination will eventually pay off. I would show her, despite her disbelief, how beautiful she is, and I would tell her that within her she has the power to instil in others, the belief that they matter.
As an adult, I have seen sadness in the hearts and minds of many. In my job I work with homeless men. Some of them are consumed by mental illness or addiction and too many others are lost in the despair of their depression. They often struggle with the baggage of self-doubt and a belief that things likely won’t get better. And if by some chance something good does happen they believe they don’t deserve the opportunity. But despite the doubt, I believe and so do many of my coworkers. As a result, opportunities arise and the men once plagued with loss and despair grow and begin to believe; believe that the world isn’t so bad and that they deserve the second chances.
I have also had the opportunity to see the beauty that exists alongside the sadness, as some of the newest children of the world are being raised to believe in themselves. These children are not just told that they are beautiful and deserve to be cared for. More importantly, they are shown how much they matter. Some little girls get flowers after a big event, as a little surprise or for no reason at all. And some little boys are cuddled as their mom wipes away the tears caused by a recent fall. My hope is that all the little girls and boys of the future never wonder if they will ever be pretty enough or smart enough and that they never question if and when they will ever be good enough…
No comments:
Post a Comment